Kaoru's Torment
by BLUEmorpheus
Summary: After graduating from Ouran, Haruhi pursued her education in Europe, and Kaoru remained in Japan, missing his chance to confess his feelings…
1. Kaoru's Torment

Summary: _**After graduating from Ouran, Haruhi pursued her education in Europe, and Kaoru remained in Japan, missing his chance to confess his feelings…**_

****_:**Hi there! This is my first time to publish a story in here..so, don't be too harsh okay?**

**NP: Stolen by Dashboard Confesional**

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><p><em><strong>Kaoru's Torment<strong>_

_I've made myself really busy for quite some time now. School works, family business, comforting Hikaru's failure on you, new clothing designs, blah…blah…blah…_

_You see, I've got lots of stuff inside my head and there's no way I could ever think of you._

_But it's not._

_I've been always thinking of you. You've been always inside of my head. It has been two months since I last saw you but there was no single moment that I would not think of you._

_School works…you…family business…you…comforting Hikaru…you…clothing designs…you…you…you…and always you! I really don't know how to get you out of my head…of my dreams…of my life!_

_Yes, dammit! You've occupied a big part of my life already. I'm still very much in love with you. That's pretty obvious._

_My feelings for you have not changed at all…*sigh*…I'm not supposed to be doing all these stupidities. But what can I do? You always pop in my mind. I myself cannot stop this. So do not blame me._

_I might be thinking of you all the time. I might be loving you from afar, but I'm not asking anything from you._

_So don't get annoyed. Just let me love you. Just let me get used to these feelings. So I can move on…_

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><p><strong>_:FUFUFU! So that was it! A bit OOC..mwahahaha!<strong>

**R&R! _**

**PS: I don't own ouran.**


	2. Hikaru's Instincts

**_ :waaaaaa! I still can't get over with Kaoru! How I love that cute, kind-hearted guy with the most heart- throbbing devilish smile! He! Is! So!...kyaaaaahhh!**

**Kaoru: *_blushing* _You're exaggerating, Ms. Blue.**

**_ : ….he….he talked to me? Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! *coughs***

**Kaoru: I'm outta here.**

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><p><strong><em>Hikaru's Instincts<em>**

That morning was very unusual with Hikaru. He was the one who stopped the clock from ringing, which I usually do. When I opened my eyes, I was surprised to see a pair of golden eyes same as mine, only that his were more mysterious that very moment.

"You do love Haruhi, ne Kaoru?" he began, looking intently at me.

I didn't know how he got to know that. For years, I had successfully mastered hiding my growing emotions towards Haruhi. And neither of the Host club was able to notice it. Not even my twin.

"My instincts told me before. But I was blinded by my own emotions I never had the chance to prove it. Until I saw that letter which I think you accidentally dropped yesterday,"

I looked at him. He didn't look like angry or jealous. His eyes were void of any emotions. Now this is the worst part of Hikaru. Even I can't read any emotions when he looked like that. And I felt alarmed.

"Why'd you have to hide it, Kaoru?"

Shall I tell him? I don't want to lie to him. But I don't want to hurt him either.

I let out a deep sigh. "I love you, Hikaru. I love the Host club."

"But you love her too."

Now I could see a tinge of concern in his face. "You love her, Hikaru. Tamaki and Kyoya love her too. It's no use competing with the three of you when I know from the start that she could never see things the way I do when I'm with her."

"That's ridiculous, Kaoru. How could you ever conclude without at least trying?" he smiled.

I was surprised by what he said. "B-but, Hikaru…"

"It's fine with me, Kaoru," he said. "So…may the best man win?"

Finally, I had managed to smile. At least I don't have to hide anything from my brother anymore. At least he could no longer be that childish anymore. And that relieved me much.

"May the best man win," I answered.

_It is a very special day for me and Hikaru. We had the chance to contact you, to talk with you even just for an hour, to laugh with you…*sigh*…I am so happy. How I miss you, Haruhi. I could sense in your voice how much you miss us too, as a family…Nah. It's fine with me. What matters most is that I had the chance to talk with you. I will cherish every minute we had. How I wish I could pull back the time so I could see you once again. _

_I love you, Haruhi…_

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><p><strong>_ :Kyaaaaaaa! Ilove you too, Kaoru! Mwahahahaah!...i still can't decide whether I give Haruhi to him or not. I'm kinda jealous, you know. Fufufufufu…What do you think,Kaoru?<strong>

**Kaoru: *_coughs* _**

**_ :MOE! Read and review!**

**_ :Oh, I forgot. I'm not HatoriBisco. *yawns* Goodnight, minna-san! See you in the next chapter! See you in my dreams, Kaoru!**

**Kaoru: …zzzZZZzzz…..zzzZZzzz…..**


	3. PS I love you

**BLUE_ : **I'M BAAAAAAACK! Waaaahhhh! Exams…exams…exams…

"Hey, Kaoru!" Hikaru jumped into my bed and tickled my nape. I swear I could kick him off my room for doing that. I just don't feel like doing it right now.

"I'm bored. Let's annoy Tono.""I'm not in the mood, Hikaru." I answered without leaving my eyes on the clock.

"Hikaru growled. Well, I'm really not in my mood today. Last night, I failed to call her because I lost my phone and I just had it replaced three hours ago. Now, just half an hour more to go and I could call her up again.

"My, my," Hikaru stared at my face. "You're hopeless, brother.""Now, what?""You're waiting for your Haruhi's call-up time."

"Whatever."He laughed.

"You're cute, Kaoru." One finger began drawing some circles on my cheek. "Especially when you blush like this."

_Pffft! _Now look who's talking! I hate it when he does that. I hate it when he teases me. I hate him for completely forgetting Haruhi since he met that Kuzunoha girl. He is so childish. And he's really getting into my nerves.

"Tell me, Kaoru. What is your status now between you, and our precious Haruhi?"

"Shut up."

His laughter grew louder "Well, what a lousy guy we have here. I already gave up on her. I stopped conversing with her for months so you could have more time to flatter her, to impress her. Too bad, I guess you haven't even confessed."

"I'm still seeking for the right time—"

"Right time, my foot! That was five months ago for Pete's sake!"

Yeah right. As if it is that easy to do. I could have done it already a long time ago. It's just that-

_Kriiiiing!_

I dismissed all thoughts running in my head when I heard my ringing tone."Kaoru, Hikaru!" As usual, Haruhi's voice was still that very eager. "Turn your computer on. My school already gave permission to use internet connection. Now, I could see you online, guys!"

I looked at Hikaru. He was walking towards the door ad about to leave again. Before going out, he even saluted and smiled. "Goodluck, bro."

When he's finally out of my room, I quickly opened my laptop. I haven't seen my Haruhi for a long time and I'm really excited this time.I eagerly followed her instruction on how I could see her. And at last, there she was. I could see her already. Her hair was now at shoulder level. Her eyes innocent eyes…her thin lips…the way she smiled when she saw me…stunningly beautiful…and my heart...It's like I've been from a race.

"Kaoru?"

"H-hi…"

"What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah…"

"Really? You look like a love struck fool." She said bluntly.

"Where's Hikaru?"

"He's…he's in Thailand." I lied. And I swear I saw a sudden sadness registered on her eyes.

"But I haven't seen nor talked to him for a coupl of mmonths now,"

"Ahh..he's busy running one of mom's agency. I'm sorry. Haruhi. "

"I understand."

Now this is why I easily get irritated with Hikaru lately. Hikaru has moved on. But Haruhi has still her eyes on him. Yes, she likes my brother enormously and I could feel it to my 's sad when he can't hear Hikaru talk. She's worried knowing Hikaru's not around.

"Kaoru? Kaoru, are you listening?"

"Huh? Uhm..yeah.."It's not like I don't want Hikaru's moving on. I just don't like the thought of Haruhi hurting because of him. Damn! Whay can't she like me? I've always been with her. I may not put it in words but I'm pretty sure I've showed my feelings to her in every way that I , it's Hikaru…But I do exactly look like him. And I'm not childish. I'm not dependent to him. I'm sensitive enough to know what she likes and what she needs.

"Kaoru, I' so excited!" Haruhi's sudden scream brought my senses back.

What is that again? Haruhi's summer vacation?"Same here, Haruhi. I'll tell the Host club about this and I'm they'll get really, really excited as well. You know how overreacting Tono and Honey- senpai are." I mimicked Tono's puppy eyes and smiled sheepishly at her.

And to my surprise, I made her laugh. No. Not the usual laugh. It's like she was happy. Maybe she misses us that much now.

"I so miss you, guys." She said. "Especially that calculating machine."

"K-Kyoya?" She especially misses Kyoya?

"Yeah. I'm wondering if he's still charging me interests for my unending debts."

_Whew!_ So that's it. She's just concerned about her debts. Not Kyoya really.

"Kaoru,"I stare at her."It's really hard staying here. Thank you for making me feel I'm not alone. I couldn't have my first sem finished without you.

"W-what? Am I hallucinating again?

"I know you're busy. But still, you never failed to call me. I really appreciate it, Kaoru."

"Anything for you, Haruhi."

"Thank you."

_You just made this day really special. All my worries, fears, and frustrations, you just miraculously wiped them all away with your words and smile. Hmmmn… Maybe I should treat Hikaru a commoner's dinner tonight. And maybe buy him something at the commoner's shopping mall. That's how much you made me smile today. I'm so excited to see you again in person. And when that day comes, I'll hug you real tight. And most likely, tell you how much you mean to me._

_PS: and oh! I love you, Haruhi…_

**_BLUE_: **THAT'S IT..^^..mooo..i'm kinda tired..


End file.
